The Christian Brother Pt 1

 

 

“Raise your hands up for the blessing,” the authoritative voice of the pastor reverberated through the church like an aftermath of a thunderous quake.

It was in the air.

The charged electronic current of a spiritual black hole, thick and heavy. if it was an oil well, everyone immersed in its weight would be a trillionaire. Brother Simon breathes in deeply, He loves it when the Spirit takes over and invades the service like He did today. This! This is what church is supposed to be like. He basks in the peaceful airy floaty feeling that bubbles on the inside of his belly and rises unannounced through his chest right out of his slightly parted lips; torrents of an unintelligible language- atleast to the human ear; but the release feels divine and he rattles on and on clicking his tongue now and again or groaning and heaving. Praying in heavenly tongues.

that is what he knew it to be; something he had done for the last fifteen years when he gave his life to Christ . Up until now he never knew what any of the prattling that escaped his lips was about, he just knew it felt like what water does to a parched throat, a deep satisfying feeling. wasn’t that what Jesus said? out of your belly shall flow rivers of life?

A smile plays on his lips as they move, unhinged. He can hear the raising voices of others around him like an orchestrated choir.

up, down.

up, down.

then suddenly there is a hush. it reminds him of the hush that fell over his class in primary seven. it was such an uncanny and noticeable occurrence that someone would immediately acknowledge it and exclaim “an angel has passed by,” rousing the whole class into laughter and chatter….a return to normalcy.

“Please bless your neighbor on the left and the right before you leave,” are the pastor’s final words.

Simon obediently and eagerly does so. He turns to give a hug to the lady on his right, a short buxom mother of two. Her smile is pleasant and pious as she hugs him back and says, “Bless you brother,” He responds cheerfully and shakes her hand, recalling stories he had heard about her. The two children , Benja and Angel, were from two different fathers, both apparently married. Simon admits to himself his revulsion of her ‘sin’ but tells himself constantly she is human, what did Jesus say to the woman committing adultery, ‘Go and sin no more, right?’ and she was in church, looking after her children and making a decent living.

Soon as he is done with his salutations to her, he turns to the person on his right, a gentleman who never talks much to anyone in the church, he comes in late after praise and worship , sits by himself in a corner at the back if he can find one and keeps to himself , often slipping out at final blessing. Brother Simon is determined to draw him out of himself soon enough.

with that ‘anha! now you are close to me sort’ of beam  Simon belts an enthusiastic ‘Hi, I am Simon,’ to his neighbor on the right, a skinny looking man with a bored visage. He reaches out and hugs him. The skinny man does not resist though he is stiff. He does not smile either. “Johans,” He replied shortly when Simon pulls back and pumps his hand emphatically.

“Glad to meet you Johans, I always see you in church but you leave really fast,”

Johan smiles from the corner of his mouth, ‘Yeah…” he trails off then adds as a quick after thought, ‘nice to meet you too,’ and starts to pick up his limp bag that lies limply on the empty seat beside him.

Simon Smiles, Not sure what else to say, “Okay bro, see you next Sunday,”Uncomfortable pause, ” there is cell on Wednesday at Pastor’s house. Where do you stay?”

Johans shrugs, “Ntinda?”

“oh cool. You should come then, Cell is in Kisaasi, you may like it. 7 pm. Great swallowship too, Pastor’s wife bakes mean cookies!” He chuckles at his own remark. nothing lightens the dead air between them. It is obvious Johans is not interested.

“oh, we will see,”

“Okay, ” Simon figures it is time to resign and try again with renewed energy next Sunday,’ Have a blest week brother,”

“You too,” Johans has successfully crawled back into his shell . If anyone was watching keenly , they would have seen his spirit run out of the church at the speed of light.

Simon claps him lightly on the back and walks out of his row into the aisle. several church members are laughing, clapping each other on the back, hugging, jesting.

Ah! Sharing Life Church he ruminates. It was one big family, everyone knew everyone. Even the new comers were quickly absorbed into the warmth of Sharing Life Church an assimilation that took the span of a few weeks; one that Johans seemed reluctant to be a part of. Simon glances back at Johans who is on his way out his head bowed slightly, shoulders hunched and thinks, ‘even him, assimilation is not a far cry for him’.

“Hey man!” someone claps him on the back. Simon does not have to turn around to know it is his friend Kassim. Kassim was a muslim who became a Christian. His life story was a stellar account of misfortune to divine fortune; thrown out at age fifteen for ‘seeing the light’ to moving from place to place till he was picked up and looked after for nine years by Pastor Jesse of Sharing Life. He always talked about how without Pastor Jesse he probably would have been dead. Four years later, after graduating from accounting school, he decided to work with the church as an accountant, completely sold over to the gospel that ‘saved him when no else could have,’

Simon often wonders whether Kassim should write a testimonial about his life, for it always carries a fresh tone everytime he recounts it to new converts.

“What’s up!” Simon bellows turning to give Kassim a side hug.

“ah nothing, Church was good!”

“I know!” Simon agrees, ‘”It felt so good. Man! days like these, I feel I could run life’s marathon without faltering.”

Kassim chuckles , “I know!” then leans in and whispers ” not even if Miss Veve said Hi?”

“waaah! not even if She smiled!” Simon replies feeling like a man who has conquered the world.

“Okay, let’s put that to the test,” Kassim’s eyes dance mischievously as his gaze follows the curvy girl dressed in a black and white floral knee length wrap dress, a red elbow length sweater and bright red pumps.

Simon feels his breath catch  and every spiritual high spirals down fast forming a holy paddle at his feet. His defences are gone and all that is left is the man in his most carnal state.

The girl with a doll face, wide eyes and cherry lips pulled back in a dazzling smile comes right up to them. Simon swears and repents simultaneously under his breath.

‘Hi Vera!” Kassim greets first. ‘You raised the praise there at the start of service! that was hot!”

“Thanks Kassim,” Vera beams and hugs him, ‘God deserves all the glory you know,”She giggles in a charming girlish way that makes Simon feel a different kind of warmth inside him. He stands transfixed. It was the effect Vera had had on him for months; but he is not the only one charmed by her. Almost all the unmarried men in church secretly harbored the thought that she was ‘Miss Sharing Life” an unofficial category award. She exuded charm, warmth and kindness . As if that wasn’t enough, she was also tagged wifey material for her mean fried rice and beef stroganoff; a feat she pulled off at the latest church cook out that garnered her the most ratings of all the girls who cooked that day.

however it was hard to tell whether she got more points for a simple meal because beauty and grace were an added advantage or her food was something that could have been served with laudable comments on the food network.

In Simon’s opinion , Pastor Vincent’s wife had an amazing rice pudding and her roasted chicken left him dreaming about it for days.

So yes, Miss Veve (Pronounced Ve-Ve) – as both him and Kassim like to refer her as because it was her radio name- could cook but dang could the girl sing too! And not forgetting being a radio host for one of Kampala’s top urban radio drive show presenters made her famous.

Basically, she was way out of his league on many fronts. He also had quite an inner struggle with that; she sung in the choir and led at times and yet had to work at a secular radio station, playing secular music. He thought she needed to look into that seriously. However it did not deter him from listening in every afternoon to catch her slightly husky voice, the girlish giggling, her smart  creative show prep and arguments with her co-presenter ‘Desh’ an arrogant persona on radio you tended to hate instantly for his obnoxiousness and shallowness; sadly he represented a large number of men on Kampala streets. In short he was the average Kampala elite. He liked her shows non the less, he found her funny and cringed a little when Desh and her flirted. He was often curious to know what she thought about it but stopped short a number of times to access how he felt about it. He had to admit, he was jealous of Desh, he seemed to effortlessly make her laugh or spew sarcasm; Simon on the other hand could not say anything beyond a ‘hi’ and maybe ‘God bless you,’

‘you look hot too eh!’ He can hear Kassim say and Vera was twirling on her heels for his assessment. Kassim was the easiest person to get along with.

‘You say that every Sunday, even if I wore rags, Kassim,’ Vera laughed this time.

Kassim shrugged, ‘what can I say, you are a star!’

Vera punches him lightly and glances at Simon. Simon had been waiting almost pensively. “Simon, whats up, you are quiet today. From the way you were harassing that dude Johans, I could say he took the fight clean out of you” she teases, smiling at him.

Simon is taken aback , “wait, you know Johans?”

“You actually saw him talk to Johans, ” Kassim tried to hint his voice a little raised.

Vera shrugged , “Johans is quite the character, and to see you try every time to draw him out is quite the spirited fight, ” she boxed him lightly on the shoulder. “Pastor in the making, right?”

“I tell him so, he should have become an usher not with the way he takes to all the newbies in church,” Kassim adds.

Simon smiles uneasily , he keeps his gaze craned on her micro braids and shrugs, “I am easy, Jonas will come around”

” I bet”

“but how do you know him? ” Simon insists, curious

Vera smiles conspiratorially, “I have my tricks”

” Ha! Is that a radio stance?” Kassim asks  lightly teasing back much to Simon’s chagrin. Vera’s presence, her glances at him were not helping him much. It felt like church had happened ages ago and he was grappling with his spirituality, how far worse could this get?

‘Dude is hungry,’ Kassim was saying and Simon realized with ever growing uneasiness he had totally zoned out for a minute there trying to figure out how to sort through his hormonal disturbance.

“What?who? Johans?” He asks and frowns when both Vera and Kassim burst into laughter.

“Not him, you!” Vera laughs out the answer, ” you spaced out on us,”

“He is really hungry,” Kassim replies enjoying the joke on Simon,  “I can’t blame you, service was great but long today. Its almost 1 ” Simon looks at them both sheepishly.

Vera shakes her head , smiles, “is that right?  So where are you guys heading for lunch?”

Simon looks at Kassim, they had not thought about it till then. Usually they made their way to a kafunda on Kampala road that served huge helpings of the best matooke and fish in groundnut stew and split it between the two of them, then made their way to Uncle Fredo’s in Wandegeya for chapattis before heading home.

However none of them was willing to let Vera on to their lunch rendezvous,

“We are still here really, we will decide when we leave,’ Simon finally speaks avoiding her gaze.

‘Aaah, why don’t I treat you guys to lunch at Fang Fang,’ She asks, ‘ it’s Sunday and swallowship with some brothers would be good, no?”

Simon smiles, “Sounds good but we cant burden you like that…”

she waves him off, ” I have VIP rights, Iam Miss Veve oba you forget?”

Simon looks at Kassim who seems ready to go. So he shrugs.

“why not!” Kassim responds.

Vera smiles sweetly from Kassim to Simon, “Cool, let me say hi to pastor and we go ,”

She places a well manicured hand on Simon’s arm in friendly reassuredness as she walks past him.

Simon sighs audibly and Kassim sniggers ,”now we have a lunch date you can talk to her ,”

Simon is guarded. Uneasy, “don’t know about this, I never really talk to her and to make matters worse, you were both teasing me.”

“What don’t you know? Free Chinese food? That’s easy, Iam starving!  or that you have a crush on Vera, that one we both know you do and you need to relax its not a sin. About teasing, you made it easy” Kassim jokes.

“The whole church has a crush on Vera, ‘ Simon speaks up defensively not particularly liking the fact that he was the brunt of a joke.

“Speak for yourself , I am just helping you to face it man, maybe she kind of likes you. did you see how she was stealing glances at you? and even put ko her hand on you as she walked off? Hmm” they both turn and watch her as she hugs the pastor and his wife and then offers to carry one of their toddlers.

“yeah,’ Simon agrees allowing that ‘different’ warm feeling to gradually envelope him.